piles of projects and exams

i have no idea how the schools expect students to juggle with the heap loads of projects and revise for the final examinations at the same time.

the short school term has deprived the students from a fulfilling learning experience, in which we resort to seek for desperate measures to appease the inner insecurity within us. Having said so, the journey to the west my graduation day is not of what i had in mind, with mindless chionging and little understanding and lots of ambiguity. we students, are pushing ourselves to the limit; by being a headless fly trying to find its way out of the urban jungle, and having less than 3h of sleep a day isnt doing any good.

hence, i urge the teachers to re look into their course structure and see if there are areas for improvements, or could any compromising be done for the greater good of the students. (i.e. my 8hrs of sleep )

such as reducing the amount of reports or projects.
I mean since, there are already ICA( projects ) for that module, what is the point of studying the theoretical part of the module? the memorising of theories still baffles me because we get to refer to them right?

like wth?

just ranting.

back to NCM.

this is my schedule for this thursday and friday

1. China immersion program interview @10 Am

2. NCM report submission @thursday,5pm

3. FM mock test paper

4. RM report submission @friday,5pm

5. CI final examination ( theory based ) @5pm

i miss spending time with my dear girls :(

oh man, how i wish i could be just a little smarter to allow my brain to function a teeny winny faster.

it's as if i see an obstacle, i will just heck it and stand there and wait for an epiphany.

LOSER right?

:(((

bahhhhhhhhh

i need the sem holidays to come really soon.

i feel so scared

i feel so stressed.

i need some aid

i need some air.

where's playtime? :(((

the reason why i chose to distant myself away from u

one moment, i claimed that u were my PBF

next moment, we drifted apart and both of us were feeling :/ :( about it

then, comes the moment where i totally feel nonchalant about it

* not exactly :/ *

during the one attempt that we tried to salvage our relationship, i told u that u dont LISTEN.

u yatter and yatter and yatter all the time.

yah, reflections were done. and the response was:

got meh? ok, i will shut up next time.

yap. then about an hour ago i received a message OTW back home.

hey wanna go minds cafe tmr? ...

haha. look who isn't listening

those who actually know me, should be able to know that i exclaim stuff to the whole entire world

eg: I LOVE BLUE

I LOVE GREEN BEAN SOUP

I AM CAVING FOR STRICTLY PANCAKES

and this friend of mine asked if i wanted to go minds cafe-.-

pardon me if u find me naggy next time.

i dont expect people to remember nitty gritty/ minor details about what i mentioned/ craved.

but i repeat my words constantly.

disappointment.

everybody is flawed

i pinpoint flaws at everybody

to be exact i am being really critical at everyone.

and yet, i didnt voice it out, instead i keep keep keep till it escalates and erupt like Mount Volcano

i am trying my best to be empathetic

:/

my right ear hurts at the same time :(((

loud people

if your initials isnt O.J.X

you arent allowed to 'shout' at me.

i hate/abhor/detest/ dislike people screaming at shouting at me. i mean if i deserved it, then so be it. if it's not, please be considerate.

i can feel the aftermath of my eardrum being hit at. :((

it's the same thing as thunder to me.

wo bu xi huan, so please be nice. spare a thought for people like me.

this is a note to my dad too

i think he has hearing problems, really need to bring him to a doctor soon.

so much for blasting loud music ( ACT YOUNG )

i am distracted with the WWW

rawr

checking my fb regularly but realising it hasnt change much since the last time i checked ( 3 mins ago ) :(((

nonetheless, i found myself going through the birthday albums and smiling at those times we had.

sad to say, there isnt any birthday celebration tmr and it's MONDAY

aka

SCHOOL!

i no want school.

bahhhhh i am a sheep

i needed to thank yisheng for awaking the Jesslyn in me * which i already did *

the jesslyn that was ONCE decisive, demanding and confident.

well, i believed that it is hidden somewhere deep deep inside me with the initial thought that my previous behaviour was uncouth as a result i chose to conceal that part of me and locked them away in faraway land.

as a matter of fact, i was being too conceited of myself, assuming that it would only happen when during casual conversations. * the idea is not to ASSUME * however, this mindset of mine already infiltrated my sub-consciousness and gained total control of how i managed things. including major projects, meetings, interviews and any other possible major thing that could aid me for a possible easier and higher self satisfaction life. -.- * big reason for the decrease in confidence *

reminiscing the good ol' days , leading the group to a successful battle, attaining satisfying results. who would have thought that the present was a total opposite? instead of being the head of the pack, i became the assistant sheep who pretended to know * in denial/ act smart * where she's going.

i have lost myself in my poly years and now it's time to awake the sleeping dragon in me. * rawr *

LOL.

I NEED EUNICE.

asap-need-to-meet-u.

meeting the aunties tmr tho :)

awesome much.

teehee.

ninja day 1

2 really strong feelings within an hour

this is the wonder of debriefing ( i think it's just mentoring's )

1. frustrated at the irony of what he just said because he believes in seniority and

big=win ( figuratively )

there were a few of us who really wanted to ask him to stop his nonsense

but like i said big=win

there is totally no room for negotiation

well, if he likes it in this way. so be it. we will never run the committee as illogical as like u did because the next person who succeeds it would rather close it down

2. disappointed

idk.

in comparison i may not be the highest GL but i am still trying every effort of mine it make it special

like i said, i am not high ( in comparison to other kukus but awesome GLs )

buttt.... i'll try to put a personal touch, i want it to be more like a family rather than a merry making grp.

i mean this is just one of many lofty aspirations

i just hope that day 2 amazing race will run smoothly.

off to google for cheers and looney ideas

(:

i am really trying

the words u said really hurt me.

:(

good camp grp = high?

stress

i never had to juggle with so many stuff before.
which includes the everyday emails that i have to check, nonstop texts that i have to reply and etc.
F.Y.I all work, no play.

Waking up with heap loads of responsibilities for you to carry.
school life being so hectic. and for that moment i thought i was gaining control of my life, well.... my world is tumbling down.
and if you think that's not bad enough wait till it's after CNY a.k.a deadlines are nearing. i need to go on E-bay to see if they sell harry potter's invisible cloak.
after saying all those i still i have to face the music. -.-

some said that i was being too harsh on myself, well maybe i am? o.0
but i want my time to be well spent. the effort i put in does not show the result that i was expecting.
can u imagine how demoralising it was for me?




i think my GPA is going to suffer
negative mindset at this crucial moment
woah jesslyn, u are really awesome.

and i thought poly life was suppose to be slackish.

behind closed doors, I have broke down too many times but at least i tried to put up a strong fight.

i had a bad day

i lost my cool in the middle of a presentation.
i still couldn't believe that i lost my temper.
imma bad girl.
i still need to complete my projects.

misery-maroon 5

there is this thing inside me, wondering why am i feeling this way
conflicting whether this is the way i want my life to be.

jeopardize my social life for some alone time?

heck with it, sleep it off.
bury myself in the world of books.

i need some buddy buddy therapy
y u not here?! :(

humiliated + pissed

i was so pissed that
1. my handwriting started to go GAGA
2. i exerted tremendous amount of strength on my pen just to feel better
3. i almost cried ;(

i am weak.
:(
booooooooooooooooooooooo

i am disgusted with myself.

remember the first time you saw susan boyle.
yeap, that was how i felt when i first saw u.
not that you have any exceptional talent or anything, just that i feel ashamed of myself for judging a book by its cover.
and now that you have transformed yourself into a cinderella
haha* i facebook stalk-ed her*
oops, that's how reality works, if you are ugly
omg, u are ostracized by everyone.
haha, come on la, thats why susan boyle took 40 years before she gathered all her courage to perform in front of an audience.

i have got a feeling that i am being too straight forward here.
oh well, it's my blog.
wanna live in denial
go ahead and listen to bruno mars.
HAH!

p.s. bad mood today, and some weight issues
faggot!

i am spamming my blogger

not going to tumblr or facebook for these few weeks. hard core mugging.
* u know how addicitive those social network websites are? *
hoho.
meanwhile...
not feeling so satisfied, because i am not a google person.
i can't get the info i want
i feel more like a liability to the group :(
suckkyy!!

yogurt

the difference between a shop n save yogurt and a "branded" yogurt
i almost died of suanness
:(
moral of the story: everything that u deem disgusting/inedible, just pass it to jeric yim (Y)
haha.
fyi. i am not materialistic. -.-
every penny that i spent, is worth it. :)
i am so going to find a job during the December holiday
1. money for a new squash racket
2. money to pay my mom :)-- so that i can exploit her walletX2 i rule!
3. money for self indulgences aka shop till i drop.

eunice wong, eunice wong, eunice wong.
i miss u like maddddddd!!!!!!!!

but i still love my poly peeps. :D
irritating but i like~
being childish all over again. hoho.

i am a fool. i cant comprehend the hidden messages that u sent
yet i dont have the guts to ask for the meaning.

one sentence u said today made me doubt my assumption.

boring~

hmmmm
i was google-ing about interesting places in Singapore
then all i got was nature parks, fish farms, goat farms, hydroponics farm
yaya. class outing go there
SO HOT. SO HOT. SO HOT
but i am more than willing to go with Eunice :D
lol.
* hey Eunice! after promos we go and visit the various museums*

so i thought of having badminton or captain ball la.
cool?
but not at unity
-.-
they don't allow dyed hair
maybe we could play at CCK stadium
i mean we could use their tennis court as captain ball courts
haha

or we could go sheng shiong and see who could get the the most no. of products with $40
lame but fun
something like treasure hunt
fyi: we are suppose to trade with other teams and return all the items in the shortest possible time.

play chicken captain ball
use a chicken and start passing to one another

play dog and bone with our leftover food

go to the library and see who can be super engross in the book for like 5 hours :D-- i used to do that with BOD

go to some random ppl's house and have a harry potter marathon

all these are for clique outings
it doesn't sound like class outing
* light bulb* :D

i hate blue

how it sucks that every time i try my best not to mention your name and it just burst out out of randomness. and how i want to express my inner emotions and my limited vocabulary just hinders everything.

我的英文和华文都有待改进。

heyyy!!

hey hey! to all those unfortunate ppl going for that korean concert who were unable to get the tickeks.
dont sad ok?
just pass me the $$, i will help u spend it.
LOL.
trust me. this is a definitely-worth-it-investment ** i will spend ALL on shopping!!!!** ALLLLL!!!!
:D
random~

btw u could really tell those aunties in JC that they really want to go shopping.
*u girls reblog like maddd*--on tumblr
haha. i want to go shopping too!
i just chiong for 2 more weeks. :X
u guys choing for 1 more month
all the best!!!
to those who have the confident to pass
for goodness sake, go get A.
yes you! go get A. cut down on the slacking and eating.
JY!

i don't mention about them on blogspot anymore, though i still do- only in front of my new friends. why?- i'm sian already. sian of catching up. don't u think it is quite boring to bring up old memories that were already brought up numerous times.-- super repetitive:( we are not creating ____________ * insert positive adjective* time together. yah yah yah. who to blame? loser-fied me. i am going to sit things out for a while.
quantity =/ quality.
till october!!!
*wake me up when September ends*